When you watch too much TV
by KCC
Summary: (COMPLETE)Our friendly but sleepy lab tech of CSI has a little acccident resulting in a strange television programme linked with our really nice fat yellow people called the simpsons
1. The dangers of coca cola

That is what happens when you watch too much television

Disclaimer; CSI is owned by CBS, Jerry Bruckheimer films and Aliance Atlantis

                    The Simpsons is owned by fox network and Matt greoning

Rating: PG to PG-13 due to subject matter

Spoilers for the following CSI episodes Pilot and stalker

Authors notes: If this offends you in any way… stuff you … no, no not really.

This is only meant to be a bit of fun please don't be offended

Me and My sister are writing this now but we are from the UK so if there is anything you don't understand highlight the word and press D

Now on with the story!

On one slow night at the Las Vegas Police department Crime lab, A very sleepy Grey Sanders, the lab technical. Gil Grissom, the night shift supervisor who by this time had done numerous crosswords and was waiting for a case to come along in fact all his team were bored just take Nick Stokes and Warrick Brown for example they had already got bored of the labs Play Station 2 and were looking for something to do like a couple of bored ten year olds, Talking of ten year olds Catherine Willows was arguing on her cell phone with Sara Sidle who wanted to take Lindsey to McDonalds for Catherine didn't have much food in her house. In the teams family well it was like a family Gil Grissom also called Grissom and Catherine Willows were like the parents, Warrick was the big brother who kept Sara Sidle and Nick Stokes out of trouble Although it is said the Warrick keeps the others out of trouble he also causes a lot of it, A new intern Holly Gribbs was killed as he fuelled his gambling addiction and Nick was nearly killed as he stepped out of the building they were in to take a cell phone call.

                  A very tired Greg sanders walks in trying to put a finger on his $ 40 a pound Hawaiian Gold Blend coffee of just a source of caffenne to keep him awake until it was time to go home but he would have to wait a little longer as he hitched a ride with our Sara Sidle who this morning got into work five hours early causing Greg to wake up five hours early, Not noticing the two test tubes on the table, A can of coca cola and the remote control. In the test tubes was Potassium Chloride, and Liqiud Mercury, In his tired state Greg knocked the remote control resulting in a domino effect then his coffee was next to the test tubes resulting in a strange coffee with potassium Chloride and now liquid mercury, a very bad tasting coffee which turned pink gregs first thought was that Nick had put dye in his coffee making it turn pink and greg Shouting "AAAHHH MAN!!" He the proceeds to drop his coffee all over the table but that wasn't the case Greg in the process knocked the can of coca cola down causing the remote control to glow. You might think that the potassium chloride and the liquid mercury would have made the remote control glow but it wasn't, it was the coca cola , You have heard that coca cola rots your teeth and now it makes your remote control glow.

                  Warrick who witnessed Gregs discovery says "Whoa, cool dude let me have a go!"then he point at the TV and presses the big red button where it was changed to the simpsons and the TV started to glow Warrrick walked towards the Tv and put his hand on the screen suddenly his arms head and torso were suked into to TV Nick screamed and grabbed Warricks ankles in doing so they were both sucked through the TV screen Grissom "My best CSIs" his leg trpeed up Catherine who was still on the phone to Sara and Lindsey, she used Grissoms leg for support and was also sucked into the TV with her cell causing Sara and Lindsey to be sucked into the TV


	2. Dominos for Lab tech Greg sanders

Disclaimer: See Chapter one  
  
Greg Sanders walks towards the TV Gil Grissom stares up at him through the TV screen and says "Greg, if you don't figure out away to get us out there will be a new opening for a lab tech!" Greg turned around calmly and belted of at full steam screaming "ECKLIE!" Warrick shouted "Coward!" after Greg but he didn't turn around.  
  
Grissom started sweating "How are we going to get out of here I have a court hearing tomorrow with that Nick replied " Gris relax it's not every day we get to star in the Simpson's!" Warrick then answered " And it is not every day that we get sucked into a TV by a sleepy Lab tech also known as Greg sanders" Lindsey pips up and says "I have the Green pages here and the have a number for our predicament now all we need is a cell" Catherine quietly steps back and says where are we going to get one of those" " Greg" Sara shouts who talking of the devil Greg comes into the room with a smiling Ecklie Sara says "Hey you little twerp get us outta here" and Ecklie pips up "at last my team are now on CSI and be head of the night shift" "Not on my life this lab is now run by me I will become Sir Greg Sanders and we will become the number one crime lab because two ain't as good" "Not one your life pal" Ecklie argued "Hey guys my mom said arguing will never stop anything just look at the war and I do have a number to get us out of this tricky little situation" Greg says "Ok Lindsey, Catherine is right" and proceeds to punch Ecklies lights out "That's not what I meant Greg, Mom do you have your Cell? Before she could answer voice from backstage shouted, "If this is supposed to be a crossover then where are we supposed to come in?" Another voice from backstage shouted "You have one line at the end, Homer, now lets get back to the story Lindsey carry on" "Mom do you really have your ." before Lindsey could continue Jim Brass walked in "What the hell?" just as Jim walked towards Greg, Ecklie leaned on the TV and was transported next to Grissom "Hey cool it still sucks people in and jumps right through, Landing on top of Sara who he has a huge crush on. Jim walks towards the TV and kicks it just as he turned around his legs were stuck right through his head was still on the outside because his stomach had blocked the rest of the way " I knew I should have lost those extra pounds I gained last Christmas" "Wait I have a idea Brass do you see a phone any where?" " Yeah sort of "he answered "Pick it up and dial 0800 DOMINOS" Greg Said " Why?" "Getting sucked through a TV sure makes a lab tech hungry"  
  
Authors notes;; Next chapter after Christmas when they get out. maybe 


	3. The Almighty and powerless nomination

A/N: Yes we know that after Christmas means not New Years Eve but we have had a pretty hectic Christmas 

So on with the story

Catherine shouts, " Oh shut up Greg it's your fault we are in here!"

" Who is the one that drinks coca cola?" Greg asks who then makes a few heads turn in Nick's direction " Don't look at me I hate any type of soda, peanut butter and candy and cup cakes and only drink iced Tea!" 

"Well who drinks coca cola?" Warrick asked, as if magic came a faint whistling sound coming from Lindsey's direction

"Mommy I'm thirsty, hungry and need to go to the bathroom"

" Oi you Mr technical cameraman is there a vending machine any where my daughter can buy a can of coca cola and is there any way that she can go to the bathroom"

"Wait a minute I have an idea, what was the number you asked me to ring?" Brass Asked

"Oh that number, 1-800 I'VE BEEN SUCKED THROUGH A TV BY A SLEEPY LAB TECH CALLED GREG SANDERS"

"Wow Greg" Sara said sarcastically "you have a hotline"

The CSIs all heard a series of dialling.

"Sorry mate" Brass called out "its Busy"

"Greg, what do you get up to in your spare time?"

"Um, do I really have to answer that"?

"NO" Sara shouted

"Hey guys if we're stuck here I suggest we nominate an all powerful leader"

"Ok any nominations" Lindsey asked

"We'll all write the name of our nomination on this piece of paper"

The Almighty Greg Sanders

Gil Grissom

Brasses Arse

Gil

The Almighty Ecklie

"Hey you copied me," Greg said

"Shut up we haven't finished the list," Said the very technical cameraman Terry

The very powerful and wise Lindsey

"I should have put that"

"SHUT UP GREG" they all shouted together

Homer Simpson

"Hey who said you could vote"

"Well it is a crossover"

Gil Grissom's Beetle formally known as Ringo

My, uh I mean Greg's Head

"Hey who said you could vote twice"

"Terry the camera man"

" What if Terry said that you had to jump off a bridge what would you say?

"Where is my swim suit"?

The almighty and powerless Gil Grissom

"NICK!!!!"

"What I didn't do anything!"

"You have ink on your hands which is still wet"

"Damn, I knew that becoming a CSI and knowing CSI's are like hell they notice every thing!"

"Yeah but Terry told me to do it"

"Would you jump off a cliff when Terry asked?" Catherine replied

"Ok then I think we have all voted so I will check the list as I was the only one not to have voted" Catherine then checked the list "Grissom's Beetle formally known as Ringo no he is out and I thought he was dead"

"How could that be I left him with Homer Simpson… Homer what did you do with Ringo?" 

"Ringo!?!" Homer asked

" Yeah the beetle I gave you and told you to look after it while I voted for brasses Arse"

"You told me is such a harsh word spoke at me is better and Ringo he died a long time ago but your beetle well he escaped and is probably nestled in the soles of Warrick's Shoe 

"Nick, Back to you, would you jump off of a Bridge when Terry asked?" Catherine asked

"Hell yes!"

"Ok then but you do not know what you are letting your self in for, Brass take it away!"

"Nicky my boy save your self but don't forget to jump off this bridge in San Francisco!" Brass Grabs the remote and presses the programme up button

"Oh Discovery Channel my favourite… Nice tornado… Braaasssss"

A/N: We are hoping to update in 2004, which won't be a very long wait 

          Stay with us to see if Grissom's beetle is alive and Nick really does go diving off of a bridge in San Francisco so stay put 


	4. Where's Remo

A/N sorry for taking so long we have started back in school this week and really haven't had much time to update

Recap: Where we left off the CSI's have been sucked in the TV with now other way to get out and Nick has been replying with weird comments and so we have left him hanging of a bridge in san Francisco.

This chapter has character off of many films Including Finding Nemo and there is more Simpson's this chapter.

"Every one run…………………………. Tornado!" Sara shouted, the tornado come towards the screen and blows off brasses pants and revels his worlds best dad boxers "I'd usually say Nicks butt not brasses butt and that is even more of it still wanna vote for him" Directing that comment at Nick 

"Hey Warr don't look at me I was sensible and voted for Grissom!" Nick replied then Grissom shouted "Brass turn over unless you want to lose your boxers!!" Homer Simpson finds Brasses pants and tries them on "ohh I have never found a pair of pants that fit so well!" Eckile goes up to Homer "how come you were warped with us you're a cartoon?!"

Homer Replies "Matt Groening told me to follow a new career it was either this or CSI Miami and seen as Gil Grissom is my biggest hero I decided to come here!"

"Still that doesn't explain why you are here?"

"Fan fic is unpredictable and exciting, Brasses pants fit me dos anything make sense anymore!"

"I agree but what I don't understand is why I couldn't solve that case and I would have had Nick arrested!"

"Hey Eckile I heard that!!!!"

"Hey Brass change the channel before lightning comes and singes your arse off!" Warrick shouts

"Hey what happened while I was gone…Its crazy they have ordinary Coke, Diet coke without caffeine, Coke with lemon and Coke with vanilla… Nice boxers Brass!" Catherine says

Brass muffles "Thanks Cath but my legs are getting chilli so it is time to change the channel!" He changes the channel and CSI Miami Flashes on the screen "Hey cool remember when we were part of this show Warrick?" Catherine asks. The enter the CSI Miami lab and meet Horatio Caine " I have an idea we will need a person with real brains, someone who has been here before? Horatio Pipes up and says "What about me?" Warrick replies with "I said REAL Brains not fake ones, Hey what about our very own Gil?" "I'm right here Warrick" Gil says "Anyway I haven't thought of a way out yet" "No Gil from season 4, He'll Have already gone through this so he can help us" "Warrick, that's crazy…so crazy it just might work. Then Gil turns up at the Turtle club in a Turtle suit with…………………….Sorry I got a bit sidetracked, "try to get CBS on the screen Brass" Sara shouted. Brass pressed the button and Sam Neill stood in front of them, " weren't you in Jurassic Park." He replies "I Am", a huge T Rex Stood up from behind some bushes.

"BRASS CHANGE THE CHANNEL" Everyone shouts at the same time.

Everyone standing there gets warped through to the next channel.

Ned Flanders Walked up to Homer and says "Hidili-ho Neighbouroonie.

"Shut-up Flanders" Homer adds

"Not there yet Brass."

Dory and Marlin flash onto the screen.

"Hi I'm Dory"

"Oh this is much better thanks,"

"I thought Finding Nemo Wasn't out on video or DVD."

 A quiet whisper from the back is heard

"Hi I'm Dory, can I help you. Marlin Where's Remo

"NEMO, NEMO, ITS NEMO YOU DULL WASTE OF SPACE.

"Hey I thought this was a children's film. Didn't I see you on TV last week?" Dory asked

"Probably we are the number two lab in the country and we have a hit show on CBS so the answer to that is yes!" Grissom answered

"Didn't I see you on TV last week?" Dory asked again

"BBBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS" They shouted in unison

CHANGE THE CHANNEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Wow that was a lot of Exclamation marks." Lindsey exclaimed

Pirates of the Caribbean flashed on the screen.

"This can't be on TV yet!" Catherine pointed out 

"And its not Out on video or DVD yet" Warrick replied.

"Maybe it's a pirate copy of pirates of the Caribbean?" Nick queried

"Carry on Brass, try to get to CBS." Grissom said

BUZZZZZZ

Disney

BUZZZZZZ

Discovery Channel

BUZZZZZZ

PBS Kids

BUZZZZZZ

CBS

BUZZZZZZ

"ABC, wait what was the last one" Catherine said

"According to the script it was CBS!" Greg said

"And who wrote the script…?" Grissom asked

"Terry the cameraman" Nick replied

"GO BACK BRASS" they all say

"Shit its only CSI Miami how long do we have to wait?" Greg asked getting like an impatient six year old "Are we there yet?"

"SHUT IT GREG!!!"

"Or should we call you Nicholas Greg Stokes or even worse Santa!"

"Santa?" Greg asked

"I'm reading your file here and it says that you are a part time toy maker!"

"That's Nicks file, you're looking at the wrong one!"

"Some boss you are no wonder I keep getting those strange e-mails…" Before Nick could continue Greg cut him off 

"The credits are here, wow, I never knew Jerry Bruckheimer directed us!"

SHUT UP GREG. 

CSI flashed on the screen

"Hey where's Grissom 

A/N Sorry for the wait we haven't had much time to update because of school and all.


	5. Lindseys discovery

                                             When you watch too much TV (Part 5)

Disclaimer: usual but you know if any of the CSI characters wanted to visit they can and I'll keep the hostage (Only kidding on the last part!)

Author Notes: This is the last chapter sob sob

                         We will probably do a sequel but we'll see

P.S There will be new characters i.e. TV Grissom ………….

They had been stuck in the TV for most of the shift- they were all bored and hungry especially Nick.

CSI Titles Flashed on the screen

"Now we need somebody smart to help get us out of here." Said Catherine

"What about TV me." Said Nick

"I SAID **SMART."**

Sara asks "then who?"

"Homer Simpson!"

"Who?" Grissom asked

"Only one of the famous Simpson's and apart from CSI one of the best shows on TV!" Sara replied 

"I didn't know you watched cartoons, Sara!" Grissom mumbled 

"You are supposed to learn something new everyday." Sara stated

Suddenly TV Grissom flashed on the TV and everything stopped, Grissom started to explain that we got sucked through… "The TV screen!" TV Grissom finished the sentence

"How on earth does season 4 Grissom do that?" Warrick asked

"It's our job to know stuff , You idiot" Grissom replied

"Your from season 4 what happens to Moi?" Greg asks

"You Become a Rock star and Become President." Said TV Grissom Sarcastically

"Wow" Replied Greg not catching onto the joke.

"Well there's one thing to do, have you tried the number 1-800 IVE BEEN SUCKED THROUGH THE TV BY GREG SANDERS" Said TV Grissom

"Yup" They all said

"Well try meddling about with the cables in the back of the TV." TV Grissom Said

They all set off behind the TV, With Grissom in front.

"Hey Guys" Homer muffled over a bag of Donuts.

"I found the sockets" Warrick Shouted.

"Can I help" Homer Said

"Sure Just connect this wire to one of then Red, Blue Or Green Cables" Warrick said

"Ok  lets try …………..the blue wire" Homer said

BBBBBBBBBBUUUUUUUUUUUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"Ok lets try the Red wire" Homer said

BBBBBBBBBBUUUUUUUUUUUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"Ok lets try………………………………………the blue one again"

BBBBBBBBBBUUUUUUUUUUUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"Oh for gods sake" Greg said and put the plug in the Green wire

BBBBBBBBBBUUUUUUUUUUUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"Shit were stuck in the TV" Homer said.

"Your always in the TV" Said Warrick

Then they heard the radio from the office

"Quick I hear the Radio" Said Greg

"Well NAH the Narrator just said that" Warrick said

"Ok lets Run" Grissom Said

They got back to the office and Lindsey had the radio in her hands

"Where'd you get that" Said Nick

"Um" Lindsey said and pointed at the 10 pounds of Ass blocking the office

"You got it from Brass" Said Greg

"No I got it from the office" Said Lindsey

"How" Said Sara

" I went out through that emergency door and……………….."

There was a huge rush for the door, Greg got sucked out first and pulled brass out. The TV stopped glowing and the rest of the CSI crew stood up.

They all went home without a word.

The next morning they were all bored and Greg knocked the mug over and the cabinet of Very Very Very Dangerous liquids.

The tv Shook and the screen glowed

GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

The End??????

A/N If this totally confused you there will be a fan club starting next year, we already have 1230090 members.

(Not really.)


End file.
